Acting Out Behavior – 5 Strategies to deal with it

What is acting out behavior? Acting out behavior is a reaction to something. The American Psychological Association defines acting out as an extreme behavioral expression of emotions that relieves tension or communicates these emotions in a disguised or indirect way. Acting out is often disruptive, especially in a classroom or at home. Acting out behavior is often on a continuum. If there is a concern about the child’s acting out behavior contact a professional. (child’s pediatrician, psychologist, social worker, etc.)

When a child is acting out the adult needs to figure out the reason behind the behavior. For example, if the child is being bullied and the child does not know how to tell someone. The child’s acting out is the way the child communicates. Another example is if a child is yelling or pitching a fit about activity in school or at home. The child may feel scared or vulnerable. Many times, acting out is a way to avoid doing what is being asked to do.

Here are 5 strategies to deal with acting out behaviors. The first strategy is for the adult to be calm. The worst thing to do is have an argument with the child. Say something like, “I understand you are upset. Take 5 deep breaths to calm down.” When a child is acting out, the adult needs to be calm and not get upset with what the child is doing. Stay calm.

The second strategy is to set the expectation. Many times, a child acts out because he/she does not want to do what is being asked. They feel scared or vulnerable. Calmly repeat the directions or expectations. Say something like, “Please sit down and read to me. I know you may not like to read to me, but I know you read very well.” Some students fear reading and want to avoid it at all costs and will do anything not to do it. The child also thinks acting out will get him/her out of it. Remember if you set the expectation you need to follow through with the expectation. For example, if the child does not want to read and acts out and delays. The adult needs to make sure the child reads the passage. If the child sees that he did not have to read by acting out he/she will do it again to avoid the situation. By setting the expectation you are also establishing the consequence. If the child delays the reading of the passage by acting out. Remind the child calmly that he/she will still have to read the passage to me later.

The third strategy is to follow through. Everything that is stated needs to be followed through. It is extremely important to follow through with the expectations and the consequences. Always follow through because if you don’t the child will learn that acting out gets him/her out of something. The child will continue to repeat the acting-out behavior.

The fourth strategy is to move a child to a quiet place or a comfortable place. Escort the child to a place where you can talk to him/her and help them to calm down in private. It should not be in front of others. Find a place where there are not many distractions or stimuli. Being away from others helps the child calm down and will be more willing to explain how he/she feels. Think about how the child is feeling and why the child felt they needed to act out. Being out of the spotlight can help them start to express their feelings by acting out behavior.

Lastly, take time to analyze the reason behavior the acting out behavior. This author believes when a child acts out there is a reason behind it. Many times, adults do not put the time into figuring out why the child acted out. If you can figure out the reason for the acting out behavior. You can solve or put systems in place to decrease the need for the child to act out. This is the most important strategy to analyze behavior. Analyzing the behavior can begin with anecdotal records. Anecdotal records are notes taken when observing a child. You can also use other forms of recording behavior. The important part is to analyze the situation, not just the acting-out part. Make sure you review what happens before, during, and after the situation. The other important piece is to ask the child what happened to make him/her so upset that they acted in a different way. Most children will tell you why they did something. Please talk to the child to help them manage their behavior. The important part is for the child to be able to tell the adult how he/she is feeling before the outburst. The solution is to help the child manage their behavior, so he/she does not feel they have to act out.